Choosing To Spend Christmas Alone
I’ve spent several months quietly pondering how I’ll spend Christmas this year. In previous years I’ve gone away with family, or visited friends. Last year I was in hospital for Christmas due to an...
View ArticleShit Has Hit The Fan
Maybe things aren’t going so well. I keep trying to convince myself that things aren’t so bad, that they could be worse, that nothing is really wrong. Yet today, when my groceries were delivered, I...
View ArticleThis Is What Depression Can Look Like
Depression. Depressed. Someone curled up in bed, hidden under the covers. Sunlight peeking in through the drawn curtains. Phone calls and voicemails ignored. Text messages unread. A dirty plate, and...
View ArticleThe Stigma Of Treatment
All the important people in my life know I struggle with my mental health. That’s old news. I’m not even overly anxious about sharing some of my struggles with the right people at the right time. On...
View ArticleAdjusting
We’re home from hospital, and as excited as I was, it’s hard. I’ve been through this process before, and it takes time to adjust to being at home, but this time it feels harder. Gone is the highly...
View ArticleWill Therapy Ever End?
Our current therapist made a comment recently that made my heart sink. They said they thought we’re likely to need, at least, some supportive counselling for the rest of our lives. The body is in it’s...
View ArticleTrying to Tread Water
I haven’t written a proper post for close to a year. That’s how long depression has been kicking my butt. Not constantly. There have been light, happy, joyful moments and days sparsely sprinkled...
View ArticlePromises
I promised my GP that I wouldn’t cancel my appointment this week. That I’d come even if I were feeling terrible. The promise was made as a safety plan of sorts. A couple of weeks ago I overdosed the...
View ArticleWaiting
Waiting for a phone call that hopefully won’t come. Waiting for the next appointment with my GP (Monday). Waiting to see my psychiatrist (Monday). Waiting, and quietly wishing, that my electrolytes...
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